25. My Mate

EPOV

“How come?” she mumbled.


“Because I said so,” I insisted.


“But why?”


“Just don’t, angel,” I scolded gently.


“But…he made me mad,” she insisted with a pout.


I nodded. “Ok, so then I want you to say that. Tell him, sweetheart. Let him know your feelings. Can you do that for me next time?“ I asked while staring intently into her eyes.


She shrugged delicately while giving me a questioning look.


“Say, ‘you’re making me mad’,” I suggested. “You are a sweet girl, and sweet girls don’t say ‘fuck off’, Isabella,” I admonished her.


“But, how come?”


“Because it’s not nice, baby.”


She huffed. “Edward, I don’t like it,” she informed me, then stuck her lollipop back in her mouth.


I sighed. “I know, sweetheart…”


We were downstairs in the living room. I had Isabella sitting in my lap while I rocked in her on our lazy boy microfiber recliner. I rubbed her back softly and she cuddled herself close to my chest. She had one hand glued to the lollipop stick hanging out of her mouth, while the other hand continued to travel softly through my hair. Sometimes her fingers would lightly scratch my scalp, sometimes those fingers would twirl different strands, other times she would just comb her fingers through it. No matter what she chose to do, that hand stayed in my hair. I figured out quickly that it was comforting for her. I guess we had that in common…sometimes, she just needed to play with some hair too.


Her Cars movie was playing on the flat screen hanging from the wall. Sometimes her attention was focused on it, but sometimes her eyes would have a far away look in them…I was extremely worried that she was reliving those terrible things I heard my Bella speak of, not thirty minutes ago.


I had stayed outside of Carlisle’s study and sat with my back against that door, trying to keep my body as close to her as possible, even if we couldn’t be in the same room together. There was no use in going back to our room, or occupying myself on my piano, or reading, because I knew that no matter where I was in the house, I would still know every single excruciating detail of what happened in her therapy session, so I decided to just stay close. Probably more for my own comfort, than hers.


My family had come home shortly after the session started. It had begun an hour late because of Isabella‘s avoidance. And then I had to go and act like a damn girl, needing reassurance from my Bella while she had made a brief appearance…so when the session was supposed to be wrapping up and coming to an end, it was actually just getting started. Their talk had lasted the good part of two hours, also.


So, it was needless to say that Carlisle and I weren’t the only ones who had their senses assaulted with the horrific tales of my Bella’s abuse. Tales that, apparently, were 'very tame’ and 'just the beginning' of her terrible childhood. We could all hear her broken, hollow voice. Everyone could smell her tears. All of us were aware when Marie decided to come around and voice her opinion of Bella’s experience in our supernatural world. We also knew when Isabella had come back out at the very end…telling Carlisle to ’fuck off', then leaving his study in a very rude manner.


In fact, that was the matter I was trying to address with her right now. It was my current dilemma…she had to stop being so damn hostile with him, but at the moment, I was absolutely not willing to punish her for it. We were both emotionally drained after the morning‘s events and I didn’t think I had it in me right now to be a heartless bastard, adding to all of her stress by spanking her ass for it.


She had come out of the study, and before I knew what I was doing, I had her in my arms, holding her tightly to my chest. I hated hearing those words coming out of my Bella’s mouth, and my anxiety was spiked just knowing that she was only getting started in revealing the evils of her past. I couldn’t even imagine what else had happened to my precious angel. She was so delicate, so fragile. That’s all my mind could register at the moment; my sweet Bella needed me. Needed my protection. Needed my comfort. And I would give it all willingly.


Isabella clung to me.


She sniffled and mumbled, “My Edward, you wanna keep me?”


My voice was hoarse from my turmoil of emotions as I whispered my reassurance in her ear. “Always, baby girl…always want to keep you. You are mine.”


“Mine…” she agreed softly in my ear.


A few minutes later, she asked for a lollipop, telling me that she always had one after she had to see the ‘mean doctors’. I immediately obliged. Whatever she wanted, she could have. I just needed to see that adorable smile on her face again.


I also needed to bleach out my goddamn brain to get rid of the knowledge of someone hurting her when I wasn’t there to stop it. But I knew that wasn’t realistic. Although, I was surprised at how much it pissed me off that the evil ability granted to me was being able to read minds…and not being able to forget. Simply because I was a vampire, I would never be able to forget any of this. Our memory never faded, never became weak. It was as sharp as any of our other keen senses.


And I fucking hated it.


“Edward?” she asked in her soft, sweet voice, bringing me back to the present moment.


“Yes, baby?” I asked keeping my tone soft and calm for her.


I couldn’t let her know how upset all of this was making me. It would only fuel her desire to avoid therapy and show hostility towards Carlisle. I needed to appear that I supported her therapy sessions, and agreed with Carlisle’s view on things. A ‘united front’ was what we were trying to display. I had to keep up appearances, for my Bella’s sake.


She sighed and looked away from the screen, into my eyes. “But how come? Why, though?” she asked with a curious expression.


“Why what, angel?”


“How come your daddy wants to know about my daddy? Why does he want to know about my owwies? How come he won’t leave me alone? He was makin me mad…“ she said.


“He wants to know so that he can make you feel better about it, eventually,” I informed her.


“Don’t wanna tell him no more about it, though…” she said with a shake of her head.


I kissed her forehead. “Shhh…” I shushed her before bringing her head down to it’s spot on my shoulder.


I knew how she felt. I didn’t want to hear about it anymore, but it appeared that neither of us would be getting our way on the matter.


She continued to suck on her candy and twirl the stick around in her mouth while she focused back on her movie. Her hand stayed trailing lazily through my messy hair. Soon, her fingers started to slow and her breathing became deeper. I knew that she was getting tired and that it was probably due to emotional exhaustion.


I kept up my slow rocking pace, and watched the movie playing on the screen without really paying attention. I was too occupied with the angel in my arms, monitoring how she was slowly slipping into unconsciousness.


When I knew she was asleep six minutes later, I gently took that lollipop out of her mouth, surprised when it was only the stick that came out. Wow…she had devoured that thing. No traces of candy left.


The family had eventually joined us in the living room while Isabella was sleeping. I didn’t bother to turn the movie off. I just sat there, methodically rocking her in my arms, in somewhat of a trance…staring at a tiny crack on the white wall in front of me.


I hadn’t realized until Emmett looked on with concern, that both of my arms had instinctually enveloped her form, tucking her completely into me, hiding most of her body from my family’s view. A second later, I noticed the light rumble subtly humming deep in my chest. It was quiet enough to be just a purr, but my family wasn’t that stupid . Their instincts told them not to mistake it for a content fucking purr.


I had taken a very natural protective stance over her. But, goddamn it…I couldn’t help myself. The ingrained need in me to protect my mate was fucking fierce right now.


I was, however, in no way trying to imply to my family that I thought they would harm her. I was suddenly desperate for them to understand that, but before I could explain, I already knew from the instant flow of their thoughts that they understood my position, not taking offense to it at all.


I kept her body pressed close to mine while continuing the slow rocking pace of this chair, making sure my angel stayed lulled to sleep. I tore my gaze away from the white wall to give my family a look of appreciation for keeping their distance right now. While I was in the recliner in one corner of the room, they kept to the complete opposite side, sitting on the couch, or standing.


Everyone seemed to be in a very somber mood this afternoon, and I knew it was because of my Bella’s therapy session.


Alice stared at the girl in my arms, with a sad look of longing on her face. I knew from her thoughts that she wanted nothing more than to just hug the crap out of Bella right now, but she knew it wouldn’t be a very smart move to get too close…or to try and wake her. Or to try and remove her from my arms to give her that intended hug.


I gave my favorite sister a sympathetic look, letting her know that I understood her need to comfort her best friend, but I also kept the very blatant warning in my stare.


Stay the fuck away.


She understood, knowing and seeing in a vision that I wouldn’t be so damn uptight in a few hours time.


Emmett and Jasper sympathized with me. While Emmett’s thoughts were clouded with anger, protectiveness and brotherly concern, Jasper worried about how he might be able to keep Alice in check in times like these, and also, how to help Bella’s emotions during therapy. He sat on the couch and planned different techniques while sending my sleepy girl calming waves to keep the nightmares away while she lay peacefully in my arms.


Jasper cared a great deal for my Bella. He wanted to prove those feelings to her, but was unsure of how to do that and keep her at a distance at the same time. He held onto an incredible amount of guilt from the incident on her 18th birthday, and the resulting events of it. The resulting events were my own fault though, because I was the dumbass who made the decision to leave her, but that’s not how Jasper viewed things. He wanted to be friends with Bella, but wanted to keep her safe at the same time. Keeping her safe required distance from him. He knew this and was extremely ashamed of his own weakness with his natural bloodlust.


His thoughts were now going into overdrive on how to help Bella from afar. He was determined to make therapy as comfortable as possible for her.


Rosalie kept her eyes on the animated movie playing on the tv, but her thoughts of sympathy for my Bella were reluctantly pouring out of her. While she couldn’t relate to what had happened to my Bella at such a young age, she could relate to being sexually assaulted.


I didn’t want to sound like an asshole, but from what we’ve heard so far on what had happened to my Bella, everyone knew that it was so much more worse than what had happened to Rosalie decades ago before her change. I didn’t have to voice that to her though, for she had already acknowledged that fact. And the fact that my Bella was not crazy, as Rosalie had initially thought. Bella was just very strong mentally, making her a survivor. She had been all her life. We both knew that her bitterness on being raped and regretting her change seemed almost insignificant in the light of my Bella’s situation.


I was still angry with Rosalie though, even now, because while I could read her sympathetic thoughts, I also acknowledged her thoughts of jealousy. She didn’t want everyone fawning over Bella and catering to her. She did not want Bella to steal the spotlight away. My sister’s ugliness truly knew no bounds.


Esme and Carlisle’s thoughts shone through with an overwhelming concern and protective instincts over the special girl in my arms. They truly viewed her as a daughter…a child all their own. Those feelings were only amplified with the arrival of Isabella.


Esme absolutely adored that side of my Bella, and right now her motherly instincts were kicking into high gear. It was ridiculous how much our urges were practically the same right now. I saw in her mind how she longed to be the one rocking my Bella in this incredibly soft and comfortable chair. Her fingers practically itched with the need to reach out and run soft caresses through my angel’s long, silky hair.


I gave her the same look I had given Alice a minute ago. My gaze never faltered, but stayed full of both understanding and warning.


Stay away. She is mine.


Carlisle was very concerned. He wondered what else had happened to my Bella, and he knew that information would most likely have to come from her alternate, Isabella. They were her memories, after all. She had taken them over so that Bella wouldn’t continue being haunted by them. He was also sad that Isabella was showing such intense hatred for him.


I felt sorry for him, for he had done nothing wrong. It was Isabella’s prejudices hindering their relationship. While I had made it crystal fucking clear to him that he should and would not react to Isabella or Marie’s behavior, I had also promised him that I would handle it. I would not have him yelling at either of them, or trying to be ‘firm’. As much as he wanted to view himself as a father figure for her, he was not. Bella was my mate. My responsibility. If her, or her alternates, needed a firm hand, I would take care of it.


No one else.


It all went back to my main thought, chanting a mantra in a cycle through my mind right now: Stay the fuck away. She is mine.


That being said, the girls were not allowed to be disrespectful towards Carlisle. Or any of my family, for that matter. I wouldn’t let Isabella get away with her rude behavior anymore. This morning was not an exception to that rule, I just chose to handle it lightly. But in the future, she would learn that her behavior with Carlisle in general, in or outside of therapy, was to remain respectful.


I made that abundantly clear to her at the dinner table last night, so I was surprised when she had completely disregarded her promise to be to ‘be a good girl’ and told him outright to “fuck off“, right before sending his leather journal crashing to the floor, scuffing up the edge of it and bending some pages.


His thoughts constantly warned me of his suspicions about Isabella and what we should expect her to display as her normal behavior. It would be the behavior of an abused child. She could be reclusive and shy sometimes, and other times we had to expect some disturbing outbursts, and her anger.


Isabella was essentially a mini-Marie. She was an alternate personality, capable of incredible anger and odd behavior. I had to keep in mind that all of Bella’s feelings of resentment and anger as a child due to her extreme stress and abuse, were invested right into Isabella. I bet she could have a temper that rivaled Marie’s extreme one. After all, Isabella has existed a long time in comparison to Marie. She would have more control and understanding over her own emotions, while Marie wears her heart on her sleeve. Marie acts out on instinct without a second thought. Isabella just may have the capacity to think before she acts. She might actually possess some common sense in that area.


Hopefully.


My girl started to stir in my arms. I tightened my hold on her. I let the fingers on my left hand trail lightly along her side, where they could reach without having to actually move my hand from it‘s firmly placed spot.


Her eyes fluttered open two minutes later. She looked up at me and I smiled at her beautiful chocolate eyes.


She giggled lightly. “Edward?”


“Yes, baby?”


“You’re makin funny noises, huh?” she said with a small smile, referring to the low growl in my chest that her ear was currently pressed against.


“Mm-hmmm,” I answered with a nod.


She sat up, so I reluctantly loosened my hold on her. But only fractionally. Once she was comfortable again, she asked, “How come?”


I gave her an Eskimo kiss and she gave me an adorable smile that thankfully eased some of my anxiety.


“Just ‘cause, baby…” I placated her, not wanting to explain my over protective instincts right now.


She turned her head then, noticing for the first time, that my entire family was in the room with us. She had never seen all of them at once before. She switched up her position, putting her back to my chest and layed her head back on my shoulder, but never took her intent gaze off of her new vampire family. She didn’t know it yet, but we were a large coven who loved her and would protect her with our undead lives.


I kissed her temple. “Say hello, Isabella,” I murmured softly against her warm skin.


She sighed. After a minute of silence, sans the Cars movie playing on the screen, she looked at Esme and said softly, “Hi, Edward’s mommy.”


Esme smiled, happy that Isabella had singled her out. It made her feel special. “Hello, dear.”


“Can I have a pop?” she asked Esme sweetly.


“Isabella, it’s almost time for lunch. Maybe afterwards,” I answered her.


“Kay.”


Her gaze went to Alice next. Alice had a ridiculous grin on her face and was staring intently at my little girl. Her excited urge to hug Isabella and be her best friend forever was practically exploding out of her.


“Marie told me you’re my bestie…” Isabella hedged shyly to Alice.


“I am,” Alice squeaked confidently, making Isabella giggle a little.


“Kay…hi,” she practically whispered.


“Hi!” Alice said brightly, making Isabella giggle again and simultaneously grip my arm that I had wrapped around her thin waist.


It appeared that she wanted to be friends with the pretty pixie before her, but was still nervous about it, apparently.


Alice went and sat on Jasper’s lap then, bringing Isabella’s focus on him next.


He smiled at her when he caught her gaze. “Hi there, Isabella. I’m Jasper and this here, is Alice, my very special girl. You two are going to be great friends,” he told her with a southern twang.


Isabella blushed and smiled shyly at him, but didn’t say anything. Her grip on my arm stayed firm.


I ran my fingers through her long hair as she fixed her gaze onto Emmett next. I thought that his size alone would make her apprehensive, but it didn’t. She didn’t show any of them fear by the sweet smell of her adrenaline, only nervousness in her gaze.


“Hey shorty,” Emmett greeted in a fun-loving way.


Isabella’s hand moved from my arm and suddenly went to grip my thumb instead. She kept her wide eyes on Emmett, but didn’t speak. For the longest time, they stared at each other. Emmett knew to give her time to adjust, so he just kept a smile on his face and nodded at her every couple of seconds. Isabella finally spoke.


“You’re big,” she stated.


He laughed. “Yes, and you are short.”


She gave him a small smile, but then sobered her look. She glanced over at Rosalie before she asked him curiously, “How come the lady with yellow hair hits you?”


“Aw, she just likes it rough,” he said jokingly, trying to placate her.


That statement was disgustingly true, but he was speaking without thinking.


Again.


Before anyone could speak up to him about it though, Isabella took everyone completely off guard, and asked, “You fuck her hard?”


Rosalie gave a little gasp and turned to stare at Isabella.


When Isabella caught her gaze, she narrowed her eyes into a cold glare, and muttered, “Ugly yellow hair…”


“Hey,” I whispered in her ear. “Be nice.”


“That’s none of your business,” Rosalie told her.


“He just made it my business,” Isabella shot right back.


“No, he didn’t,” Rosalie insisted. “It’s rude to ask things like that,” she added, apparently trying to teach my girl some manners.


I squinted my eyes at Rosalie in warning and Emmett gave her a look that clearly said, ‘don’t start anything’.


“You’re rude,” Isabella countered.


Rosalie rolled her eyes and turned her gaze back to the tv.


“I don’t like you,” Isabella added a few seconds later.


I stopped my slow rocking and tightened my hold on her. “That’s enough, baby girl. You need to apologize to Carlisle,” I insisted with a nod in his direction, taking her focus off of Rosalie.


She turned and shot me a betrayed look. “But why?”


“Because you were rude to him in his office.”


“Was not, he made me mad,” she supplied.


“That’s not an excuse,” I insisted. “We’ve been over this. Next time, you tell him that he’s making you mad. You don‘t tell people to ‘fuck off‘, Isabella. That‘s bad.”


“Edward?”


“Hmm?”


“Can I have a pop?”


I sighed. “After lunch, baby. Now, apologize.”


“Can I go play outside?”


“Tell him you’re sorry.”


“Can I draw in my book and color?”


“Say you’re sorry.”


“Can I go get my dolly?”


“Now, Isabella.”


“Can we watch another funny movie?”


“Stop it, baby.”


“Can I have a lolly?”


“No.”


“Wanna help me make somethin with my pretty play-doh that sparkles?”


I kissed her temple. “Isabella…stop. Right now. Just apologize, and then after lunch you can go do all those things,” I assured her softly.


“But can we get in Marie’s box and play with all the little beadies?”


“Sweetheart-”


“I can make you something pretty, huh?”


“Isabella, if you-”


“I’ll draw you another picture, Edward.”


“Not right this-”


“Let’s play,” she suggested brightly.


Fucking hell.


She was very skilled in avoidance tactics, obviously.


Emmett snickered, but tried to hide it. He wasn’t doing a very good job.


I lightly gripped her chin and turned her gaze to mine. I needed her to focus. “Stop avoiding it, Isabella. Listen to me and do as your told,” I told her.


She started lightly sucking on her lips, occasionally tugging them with her teeth. After a few seconds, she said, “I’m thirsty. Do you got a juice box?”


I nodded and let go of her chin. “Apologize.”


She furrowed her brow at me and whined. “But, Edwaaaard…”


I hardened my gaze then. She was still avoiding it, and whining was against the fucking rules. “Now,” I told her firmly.


She dropped her gaze from mine and sighed. A few seconds later, I heard, “Sorry,” she being muttered under her breath.


“Nooo, angel…not to me. Apologize to Carlisle,” I clarified.


She gasped and looked back up into my eyes. “But he gots ugly yellow hair,” she stressed.


I shook my head and glared at her. This hair thing was going to have to stop.


“Now,” I repeated.


After a minute, she actually returned my glare with one of her own. Then she went and crossed her arms over her chest.


“Don’t. Wanna.” she stated defiantly with a slow shake of her head.


I hooked my hands under her shoulders and stood from the recliner then, keeping her in my arms. Her legs wrapped around my waist as I gripped her tightly to me, still feeling ridiculously protective.


As I headed for the staircase and passed by Carlisle, I assured him in a sincere voice, “Isabella is very sorry.”


He nodded at me, giving me a sympathetic look. He had been telling me in his thoughts that it was fine, and that she should apologize on her own. But what he didn’t realize, was that she would never apologize on her own. I knew my Bella like the back of my hand, and it looks like her stubbornness knew no bounds…even as a child.


Isabella shook her head, looking back at him over my shoulder, as we retreated further and further away, towards the steps leading to our bedroom.


“Am not,” she insisted in a hostile tone.


“You will be,” I threatened.