10. A Trip To The Store

BPOV

Edward had tried to console me on the fact that I was expelled. He informed me that I had other options of finishing my high school credits, like night and summer school. He said it wouldn’t take much since there was only three months left in my high school career. The fact that not all hope was lost when it came to my high school diploma, brightened my mood a bit.


We were back on the road, on our way to the pharmacy, when Edward broke the silence with his velvety voice. “Love, I’m sorry I can’t help you make Marie’s voice stay quiet inside your head,” he said while taking my hand in his own. “Is it actually causing you pain?” he asked with concern. “What types of things was she saying that made you scream at her like that?”


I rolled my eyes. “Don’t feel bad, Edward. I know you can’t make her voice stop, and that it’s all in my head.” I sighed, “God, I really do sound like a crazy person,“ I said with defeat.


“Hey,” Edward said, feigning hurt. “I hear voices too,” he said, a smile playing on his lips.


I smiled back. “Yeah, but your ability is so much cooler than mine,” I said, playing along. “You can hear people’s thoughts, and that’s awesome. I just create imaginary people that live in my head to deal with all the stuff that I can’t seem to handle,” I said jokingly, but we both knew that I was dead serious.


He kissed my palm and repeated what he told me last night. “Your mind is fascinating,” he said with a wink.


After a few seconds, he repeated his question. “Does it hurt much, baby? You know…when she’s speaking and won’t stay quiet?”


“Yeah, sometimes…it can give me an actual headache. Right now, it’s just a dull ache. Nothing too bad,” I said nonchalantly with a shrug.


He nodded and voiced the last of his questions. “What was she saying?” he asked hesitantly.


“She was basically just defending her actions. I understand her actions, but that doesn’t mean that I agree with them. Or that I am, by any means, happy with the results of most of her decisions. She’s an angry, violent girl…it gets me into a lot of trouble,“ I said, remembering some times over the past few months that had been particularly hard for me because of Marie.


“She has a need deep within the core of her being to protect. After all, that is like…the purpose of her existence, ya know?” I looked at Edward and realized that I was not sorry at all for being about to bring this up. “That was your job, but when you guys skipped town, my protector was suddenly gone.” I watched as pain etched on his features, but I continued on. “But just because my protector had left, didn’t mean I was out of danger. By any means. Okay…Victoria and werewolves aside, there was still the everyday, human dangers that people encounter. Rapists, drug dealers, thieves…and just the common mean person. Scandalous people who want to take advantage of your trust and kindness…” I sighed, not finishing my thought. I wasn’t ready to tell Edward about my life while he was gone.


He stayed quiet, listening to me with a guilty look on his face.


I changed the subject back to Marie. “Marie doesn’t see reason…like I explained last night, she seems to lack that common sense. Well, this whole fiasco just proves it. In her mind, there was nothing wrong with smacking Lauren for insulting me. And then when Lauren tried to retaliate, she struck back at her with more force. It all falls back on her instinct to act without thinking. Her main thought is continually to protect, and do it well…no matter who ends up getting hurt. For example, if Lauren had actually made contact with her intended hit, then Marie would have reacted with a lot more than just that single punch to her jaw. The punch was more like a warning for Lauren to just stay down. And then when the coach grabbed her arm, the same instincts kicked in. She doesn’t like anyone handling our body roughly…especially a man,” I finished quietly.


Edward took a minute to let all this information sink in. He pulled into a parking space at the pharmacy then he turned his body toward mine.

“Has she had to protect you before…from a man handling you roughly?” he asked with apprehension.


I looked up at him from the passenger seat. I found his gold eyes intently fixed on mine. I tried to pour all the pain and embarrassment I had with those particularly harsh memories into my gaze, then smiled sadly after a minute.

“I think you know the answer to that, Edward,” I said sadly.


He hissed then a growl ripped from his chest. I ran my fingers through my hair, getting frustrated and sighed. I tore my gaze from his growly dramatics and looked out the window.

After a minute he asked, “What happened?”

I shook my head, not wanting to talk about it. This day was bad enough. I needed some cheering up…not to talk about these things.


I shrugged, still not looking at him. “Edward, I don’t want to talk about it.”


“Bella-”


“Edward,” I said pointedly. and turned to face him. “Could you please just go get my medicine, so we can go to store? I really want to get started on packing and get out of my father‘s house so that he can move his whore in as soon as possible,” I said flippantly, completely dismissing the subject.


He looked defeated, then quickly brought his lips to mine. The kiss felt almost desperate on his end and after he broke away, he whispered, “I love you,” and it sounded almost apologetic.


“Yeah, I love you too,” I said, then turned away from him, looking out the window again.


I was starting to get upset with Edward. This whole situation and reason for it, along with a lot of stuff that had happened to me since my birthday, pointed back to the event of him and his family leaving. If he hadn’t left me…he would have been there to protect me from a lot of things, and my mind wouldn’t have found a need to create Marie, and I wouldn’t have gotten into a bunch of trouble because of her behavior over the months, and today wouldn’t have been a bad day, and I wouldn’t be fucking expelled from school right now.


Goddamn it! I hate you right now, Marie.


Well, I fucking love you Bell. You’ll calm down eventually, and I’ll still be here, darling.


Shut up. Ugh, I need to calm down…Edward is here now. Focus on that.


Edward exited the Volvo then, and while he was in the building, I took calming breaths and relaxed, focusing on how happy Edward usually makes me and the fact that he was being very accepting of the complete mess that I am now.


When Edward got back in the Volvo, I took the medicine from him with a small smile and occupied myself by reading the pamphlet they stuck in the bag while he drove to the store.

Edward seemed tense beside me while he drove and I saw that his hands were gripping the steering wheel very tightly. I sighed, wanting to stay calm. I knew what he was thinking. He was wondering what had happened when I had been ‘handled roughly’ and the possibilities running through his mind right now must have been horrific and endless.


When he pulled into the parking space at the store, I went to unbuckle my seat belt, but what he said when he turned the car off, made me freeze in my spot.

EPOV

I couldn’t handle knowing that someone had hurt her. That her time here in Forks without me had been full of pain and danger…but apparently, it was. This was just more evidence that all my hopes of her being safe and eventually happy without my vampire coven around, had gone to shit. The thoughts running through my head of all the things that could have happened to her were driving me insane. I couldn’t take not knowing for sure what had happened.


“Bella, were you raped?” I blurted out before I could stop myself. I stopped breathing and tensed even more, waiting for her reply.


I saw her body stiffen, her hand on the seat buckle, as she turned her gaze slowly to me. She spoke carefully and very quietly. Like she was telling me a secret. Instead of answering me directly, she replied with, “I’m still a virgin, Edward.”


I was confused now. “What…what happened, Bella?”


She was quiet for a minute, clearly trying to decide whether or not to tell me. I hoped she trusted me enough to confide in me. She used to tell me everything.

Finally, she quietly spoke again, keeping our eye contact. “It never got that far, Edward. That’s where Marie comes in…” she said pointedly, as if she was trying to tell me something without actually saying it.


“So…she protected you?” I guessed.


She nodded grimly.


“How, Bella? What did Marie do that you couldn’t do yourself?” I wondered aloud.


Without skipping a beat she replied, quick and quiet, “He’s dead,” staring at me intently.


I couldn’t stop my mouth from dropping open in shock.

Seeing my reaction, she tried quickly to explain, her voice no longer a whisper. She shook her head a bit, then said “I couldn’t do it, Edward…because I’m too weak. So she did. That man is dead, and I still have my virginity.”


My feelings of pride and gratitude for Marie were overwhelming me right now. I was afraid that she took my shocked expression as a bad thing, though. My breath came out in a rush. “H-How?” I breathed out.


She hung her head a bit in shame, and I decided to correct her perception of my reaction. “No, Bella…no, I’m not upset.” She looked back up at me then, so I continued. “I’m quite the opposite actually. Tell me how, baby…what did Marie do?” I asked very intrigued now.


“She used his own weapon on him. A knife.” She paused and then continued after some thought. “I have the knowledge on how to defend myself, Edward. I actually know how to kill a person in quite a few different ways, from both my education and some street fighting. You know, with my dad being a cop and all, I‘ve taken tons of hands-on classes on the subject…it’s just that I lack the guts to actually put any of it into action, I guess. Marie, on the other hand…actually enjoys herself when she lets our violent tendencies come out. That’s how she knows how to fight really well, and how to throw a punch properly. We know a lot of stuff…but she’s actually the one that puts it to use all the time. Violence and blood make me cringe. On the other hand, with her it seems like it’s almost therapeutic. You should probably know that she really enjoys fighting…you know, for future reference.”


I nodded, “I’ll keep that in mind,” then took her precious face in my hands. “I’m so glad that things didn’t get that far. That he didn’t get a chance to hurt you,” I told her before I touched my lips to hers. When we broke away, I murmured against her lips, “I’m very proud of Marie, you know.”


She nodded a little, her face still in my hands. “Yeah, I was too.”

I smiled.

She pecked my lips quickly then. “Let’s go get some boxes. And we can’t forget about my gum,” she said with a smile, clearly trying to lighten the mood. I could tell that the subject was making her uncomfortable.


“Okay sweetheart,“ I agreed, then let go of her face and got out of the car.

I came over to her side, opened the door for her, then we linked our hands together, and walked towards the store‘s entrance.


When we were out of the parking lot and on the sidewalk, I noticed that Bella was twisting the ballcap she had on so that it was on backwards.

I had grabbed my baseball cap out of my trunk and told her to put it on while we were pulled over on the side of the road. When she said that she had a headache, I knew that it would help and keep light out of her eyes, but now it was on her head so that the part that was supposed to provide her eyes with some shade, was on the back of her head now, completely rendering my idea useless.

We were approaching the entrance doors, when my Bella quickly skipped ahead of me with a smile on her face, then turned around to face me while she walked backwards.


"Hey, Edward?” she asked, clearly in a better mood now.


I smiled back, “Yeah, baby?”


“When we pick up the boxes and my fuckawesome minty gum, can we get icecream too?” she asked excitedly.


Ah, my Marie.


I gently grabbed her arm and turned her around, so that she was facing the right direction. I didn’t like her walking backwards, it made me nervous. When we were side by side, I wrapped my arm around her waist.

“What flavor would you like, Marie?”


“Um…” she squinted her eyes in thought, “cookies n’ cream is like an orgasm in your mouth, so I think I want that one,” she said brightly with a smirk.

I smiled at her, always amused by her bizarre metaphors and language.

Then she gasped, “We need a cart!” and ran off to go grab one before I could stop her.


She rushed back over to me, and when the cart was rolling at a fast pace from her running, she hopped up on the back of it, keeping her hands on the handles and rode the cart the rest of the way over to me.

I grabbed the end of the cart when it approached me, to stop it from continuing to move forward and give Marie a ride. She giggled at me with excitement lighting up her chocolate eyes, and hopped down as I came around to the front to grab the handle and push the cart myself.


After we started walking again, Marie stepped up onto the side of cart while it was still moving, and climbed over the side of the basket, getting in and sitting down in the middle. She positioned herself so that her back was up against the end of the cart and she was facing forward, looking at me.

A huge grin spread across her face.


I smiled back at her, realizing that her perky attitude and happiness was undeniably contagious. “What’s got you so happy, Marie?”


“I get my gum!” she exclaimed excitedly.

I chuckled at her childish, but cute behavior.

“And icecream!” she added with a smile. “And…”


“And?” I prompted her while turning down an aisle.


“And you said that you were proud of me. I heard you,” she smiled smugly.


I nodded. “I am very proud of you when it comes to that particular incident,” I confirmed.


She grinned again, then started bouncing a little in place as we approached the icecream.

I watched her fondly. I could see that besides her tantrums, her mood right now also demonstrated her child-like mind state. She was so easily amused. And she seemed extremely satisfied that I said I was proud of her...like she had done some great accomplishment.


She pointed at the icecream behind the freezer door. “That one,” she said while pointing at the Edy’s brand icecream tubs.

I picked out the cookies n’ cream flavor and brought it back to the cart. She reached up for it as I handed it to her. “There you go, sweetheart.”

She smiled gratefully. “Thank you.” She placed the carton of icecream down in front of her and traced her fingertip across the cold lid.


Fucking adorable.


I started pushing the cart again, heading over to a section where we could pick up some broken-down boxes from the store's deliveries. Marie was busy watching her surroundings, and absently tracing her fingers around the cold carton placed at her feet. Music was playing on the overhead speaker system of the store and Marie started distractedly singing softly along, not missing a beat and softly in tune. It was a Mariah Carey song called ‘Hate You’ that had just come on. I walk at a relaxed pace, enjoying her voice. I loved this about Marie. She wasn’t shy at all, had almost no inhibitions. I could listen to her beautiful, melodic voice all day long.


After I picked up some boxing tape and some flattened boxes, and placed them in the storage carrying area below the cart, I headed up to the front of the store to check out. I noticed while I was getting the boxes that Marie kept tiredly rubbing her eyes, and when she yawned, I knew it was time to go.

Marie had a strand of her hair in front of her and was braiding it until she noticed where we were headed. “Don’t forget my yummy gum, kay Edward?”


"I know,” I said assuring her that I hadn’t forgotten and turned towards the candy in the checkout aisle.

I grabbed a pack of Orbit spearmint flavored gum and put it on the vendor belt next to the boxing tape. Then I reached for the icecream, so Marie handed it to me and I placed it down by the gum.

“Come on, spider monkey, time to climb out of the cart,” I told her.


“But I wanna keep riding in it…” she responded, and I heard a slight whine to her tone. Then I saw how she pouted out her bottom lip, for added affect.


I shook my head, ignoring her antics. “No Marie, we‘re done shopping. Ride is over, baby,” I said firmly, and reached for her.

She stood up and held her arms out to me, so I wrapped my hands around her small waist and lifted her out of the cart, then set her back down on the ground.


After I paid, we walked back out to my car and put the boxes in the trunk along with the shopping bag that Marie had carried out with her. When we got in the car, I made sure Marie was buckled up, then started speeding through the drive out to my house.

We had to put her icecream in the freezer before it melted and I wanted to drop her medicine off too, before we made the drive out to Charlie’s house.